Living with a Stoma
Practical psychological information and support to help you feel more confident, worry less and get back to the things that matter to you.
Life with a stoma is about more than stoma care:
Having a stoma can involve much more than learning how to manage a stoma or pouch. It can also affect how you feel about your body, your confidence, your relationships, your work, your travel plans, your social activities and your everyday routines.
Some people adjust relatively quickly, while for others it takes time. Along the way, you may experience worry, embarrassment, frustration, sadness or uncertainty. You might worry about leakage, odour or noise, finding toilets, being away from home, or what other people might think. You might also wonder how your stoma will affect your relationships and social life.
These reactions are understandable, and you are not alone in having them. This section offers practical psychological information and strategies to help you adjust, manage worry and rebuild your confidence at a pace that suits you.
The focus is less on “How do I care for my stoma?” and more on “How do I live confidently with my stoma?”
What you’ll find in this section:
- Emotional Wellbeing – Understand the feelings that can come with a stoma, from worry and frustration to sadness and loss of confidence, and why they are a normal part of adjusting.
- Stoma Worries & Anxiety – Find out why worries about leaks, smells, noises and toilets can take hold, and how to stop them holding you back.
- Body Image & Confidence – Explore ways to feel more comfortable with the changes to your body and with how you look and feel.
- Relationships & Social Connection – Get ideas for talking with family, friends, partners and colleagues, and for staying connected to the people who matter to you.
- Getting Back to Everyday Life – Build confidence step by step with work, exercise, eating out, socialising and travel.
- Managing Difficult Thoughts & Feelings – Learn practical skills for dealing with worry, self-criticism and unhelpful predictions.
- Getting Support – Find out when and where to turn for medical, emotional and peer support.
Is this section for you?
This section may be helpful if you have a stoma, are preparing for stoma surgery, or are supporting someone who does, and you:
- Feel worried or self-conscious about your stoma or pouch
- Avoid places, activities or situations because of “what if” thoughts
- Are finding it hard to get used to changes in your body
- Feel anxious about leaving the house, travelling or being away from a toilet
- Want to feel more confident with friends, family, colleagues or a partner
- Are finding that adjusting is taking longer than you expected
Where to start:
There is no right order. You can read the pages in sequence or go straight to the topic that feels most relevant to you right now. If you’re not sure where to begin, Emotional Wellbeing is a good starting point, and Stoma Worries & Anxiety is a helpful next step if worry is stopping you from doing things you value.
A note about medical advice:
The information on this website is intended to support psychological wellbeing and does not replace advice from your healthcare team. If you have questions about your stoma, pouch, skin, output or other physical symptoms, please speak with your stomal therapy nurse or treating health professional. If worry, low mood or difficulty adjusting is affecting your daily life, talking with a psychologist or other mental health professional may help.
Free program for stoma worries. If worry about pouch leakage, noise or smell is holding you back, the free Bladder and Bowel Anxiety Program on this website offers seven modules of practical strategies, drawn from research and clinical practice, to help you build confidence in everyday situations.
Living with a stoma can take time to get used to, but you don’t have to work it out alone.