Body Image & Confidence
Changes to your body can affect how you see yourself and how comfortable you feel around other people. You may be getting used to your stoma, your pouch or the way clothes fit. This page focuses on finding a more comfortable relationship with your body, without pressure to feel positive about every change.
Confidence does not have to mean loving how your body looks. It may mean feeling less preoccupied with your appearance, being more comfortable in your clothes or taking part in something you have been avoiding.
Getting used to changes in your body:
- Seeing your stoma for the first time. You may feel unsure what to expect or have a strong reaction to seeing a change in your body. You can ask your stomal therapy nurse to explain what you are seeing and support you as you become more familiar with it.
- Getting used to wearing a pouch. The pouch may initially feel unfamiliar or draw your attention throughout the day. Give yourself room to get used to it, and discuss fit or comfort concerns with your stomal therapy nurse rather than assuming you simply have to put up with them.
- Feeling self-conscious. You may find yourself wondering whether other people are looking at your abdomen or can see your pouch. Notice the difference between what you fear someone has noticed and what you actually know.
- Clothing and appearance. Choose clothes that feel comfortable and reflect your preferences. You do not have to dress to prove you are confident, and deciding to cover your pouch is a personal choice.
- Looking at and touching your abdomen. If this feels difficult, tell your stomal therapy nurse so they can help you approach necessary care with support. Follow their guidance about healing and handling your stoma rather than pushing yourself before you are ready.
- Feeling attractive. Changes in appearance may leave you uncertain about how you see yourself. There is no requirement to feel attractive all the time; feeling comfortable, expressing your own style and recognising qualities beyond appearance can also matter.
- Comparing yourself with before surgery. You may miss how your body looked or felt before. Acknowledge that loss without treating your previous appearance as the standard you must meet to enjoy life now.
- Rebuilding confidence. Think about what feeling more comfortable would let you do: see a friend, wear an outfit you like or spend less time worrying about your appearance. Choose a manageable goal that fits your recovery and circumstances.
Comfort, not perfection:
It can take time to adjust to changes in how your body looks and feels. You do not have to love every aspect of your stoma or your body. A helpful goal may simply be becoming more comfortable with it and reducing how much worries about appearance limit your life.
If concerns about your appearance are making daily life difficult, you can talk with a psychologist or another mental health professional. You do not need to wait until you feel worse to ask for support. Explore Emotional Wellbeing or Getting Support for more information.